Last week I made my biggest mom brain fail to date. I washed my iPhone in the laundry.
Yup, you read that right.
People think it’s a big deal to drop an iPhone. Well, I’m pretty the world would have had a heart attack when they saw my phone come out of the washer.
The thing about mom brain is that moms are always thinking about too many things at once. I’m never able to keep my attention on just one thing. Plus, even when I think I’m finally focused in on something, I get interrupted. Generally, I feel like I must have left my brain at the hospital when Desirae was born. (Too bad I couldn’t have left the memories of labor pains instead.) As a result, I randomly forget things and apparently do things without even noticing, like washing my iPhone in the laundry. I’m pretty sure that the blank look that I carry around on my face confirms my mom brain problem.
I don’t exactly know how my iPhone ended up in the laundry. Obviously, if I had known, it would have never happened. See, I decided to do laundry last Friday, and in typical mom fashion, I was interrupted multiple times during the laundry process. For some odd reason, I decided to do the laundry while I was also cleaning the bathroom, the dishes needed to be washed, Desirae wanted to eat lunch, the dog needed to go outside, and my coffee was brewing. Getting my basket of laundry sorted, into the basement, and into the washer turned from a three step process into a ten step process. I think we can all agree I was trying to do too much.
I could have been smart and waited to do the laundry at nap time, but I didn’t. I’m an all or nothing kind of girl.
This is what I think happened. Somewhere between taking my laundry from the second floor to the basement, I put both my phone and my baby monitor on top of the laundry basket. Since my hands were full and I didn’t have any pockets, putting my phone and baby monitor on top of the laundry made sense, except there was no reason for me to carry around the baby monitor. Desirae wasn’t napping. On top of that, the laundry didn’t make it to the basement. It stopped on the main floor while I fed Desirae, put away cleaning supplies, and washed some of the dishes. Then somewhere in there I absentmindedly grabbed my phone out of the laundry basket and put it in my pocket, fed Desirae some more oranges, finished the dishes, ran into the basement, and dumped the laundry into the washer.
As it turns out, I didn’t grab my phone. I grabbed my baby monitor. All that time I thought I had my phone, my baby monitor was in my pocket.
I thoroughly regret the loss of my brain.
After everything was clean and Desirae was down for her nap, I finally realized I didn’t have my phone. That’s pretty normal for me. In the midst of everything, I usually lose track of my phone a couple of times a day. But this time I couldn’t find it anywhere. Finally, I decided that I had probably left my phone in the nursery, and I would get it when Desirae woke up from her nap.
That’s when I remembered I had to switch my laundry over to the dryer.
As I reached into the washer and lifted out the last shirt, there was my phone. It was lying there black, lifeless, and very, very clean.
When realized what I had done, profanity may have also exited my mouth. (That’s a big deal for me guys.) You should have seen the look on my face.
I WASHED my PHONE through an ENTIRE cycle! This was way beyond just dropping my phone! My phone was agitated, washed, spun, rinsed, and spun again for about 45 minutes. I may as well have just thrown my laptop in the washer, because that’s about the equivalent of what I did.
To add insult to injury, it turns out I never even poured in the laundry detergent, so I had to rewash the clothes that had collaborated in potentially murdering my phone.
I immediately ran upstairs and put my phone in a bowl of rice, which was quickly followed by multiple phone calls to Aaron and several profuse apologies.
Through this experience I’ve come to the decision that rice is where phones go to die. Everything has to be buried somewhere.
But, by some miracle, or maybe my phone’s sheer will to live, it SURVIVED.
My phone has a few issues that are annoying, but I’m getting used to them. I just have to avoid the letter P, the Instagram message box, deleting photos from my camera roll, or anything else located on the right edge of my screen. It’s kind of like my penance for my mistake. What matters is my phone is miraculously working, which is truly a miracle.
So, to all my mom friends out there, try not to do too many things at once. And never carry your phone in a laundry basket.
Hope you have a great weekend!