Mom life

To the New Mothers

To all the new mothers,

You know what? I get it. Becoming a mom is HARD. All the other moms, even the ones who you think have this mom thing figured out, struggled through this crazy transition into motherhood. You are not alone. I want you to know, you are going to make it. This newborn stage doesn’t last long. Keep your chin up.

Be assured that you don’t have to have it all figured out. Really, all the moms out there are just winging it and doing the best they can. They don’t have it figured out either. No one is super mom. Don’t compare yourself to other moms! That’s not going to do anyone any good. You are unique, your baby is unique, and the bond the two of you have is unique. There is no sense in comparing yourself to other moms because no mom and baby are alike.

You have this brand new, precious, tiny life in your hands, and it’s up to you to take care of him. You’re probably worried that you’re going to know what to do. It’s crazy how many concerns you can have about such a little person. Did you buy the right car seat? Is your baby supposed to sound like that when he is sleeping? How do you know if your baby is eating enough? Is it normal for baby poop to look like that? What do you do if your newborn gets sick? Are you sure your baby is breathing? The list goes on… Trust your instincts. No one in the world knows your baby like you. When in doubt, call your mom or a doctor. We’re all here to help.

The only job you have right now is to take care of your baby and yourself. Everything else can wait. This newborn phase is so short. Don’t waste it by worrying about cleaning the house, making fresh meals, or devising a plan on how to become the world’s first super mom. Right now, that baby needs you – ALL of you. The rest of life’s responsibilities can wait. You can figure out how to deal with it all later (and by later, I mean several months from now). Take care of yourself and baby. That’s it.

I know it’s hard to accept help sometimes, but you need to. This whole baby thing is new and can feel overwhelming. Just a few days ago you were a self-sufficient woman. You could do all your errands, all your cleaning and laundry, and all your work by yourself. You didn’t need help, and now you do. That’s okay. Accept the help. A few days ago you didn’t have to take care of a small and helpless human. You didn’t have to try and recover from the most intense thing you’ve ever done – labor. Let people help you. Not being able to do your dishes says NOTHING about who you are and your capabilities as a woman and mother. Do NOT believe the lie that your dirty house or the takeout sitting on your counter means you’re a bad mom. You are a GREAT mom.

By concentrating on your baby and yourself, you are being the BEST mom you can be. That’s what you need to be doing right now. That baby needs YOU. Your baby doesn’t need a clean kitchen, or homemade meals, or a spotless floor, or you with your hair done and makeup on. Your baby just needs his mama. Leave the house and errands to another day. Love on your baby. Give your baby what he needs – YOU.

In case you didn’t know, people actually LIKE to help you. They want to bring you meals and do your laundry. People love you and want to help you. They know this is hard and that no one can do it alone. Plus, it gives them an excuse to come see that sweet baby. They will do anything to hold that precious newborn for a minute.

I want you to know that you are AMAZING. You have created and given life to the most BEAUTIFUL baby, and it wasn’t easy! That right there means your name should go down in the history books. You are an INCREDIBLE mother. This motherhood thing has its ups and its down, but it’s the most wonderful and rewarding thing you’ll ever do. You’re going to figure it out with time. Enjoy your precious newborn. Know that you are the BEST mom you can be because you are your baby’s mom. No one in the world can fulfill that position like you. Be your baby’s mom. Be you. That’s all you need to do. You got this, because you are AWESOME.

As your baby gets older, you’ll realize that none of us have motherhood figured out. We’re all just doing the best we can to raise our tiny humans. It’s the best thing we will ever do, and the good news is, we’re all in this together. (Cue the High School Musical cast.)

Welcome to the club, mom!

-Mama J.

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